True Authenticity Pt. 2: Clearing Up the Misconception

Last week we dealt with one part of what authenticity in its purest form looks like. This week, I’d like to clear up the misconception a little further. For many, “being real” gives them an excuse to be a royal pain in the you know what. You have these people that go around being so rude and mean to people under the pretense of not being fake and “keeping it real”.

Trust me, I’ve heard this time and time again. This exchange happens especially between women. Let me paint this picture for you…

You’re invited to a party and you’ve heard through the grapevine that another female is going to be there that you don’t necessarily vibe with. You decide to go to the party anyway with the intention of not making an issue out of it. There will be other people there that you get along with. You go to the party and you catch the gaze of this other female’s side-eye towards you. Despite the apparent shade, you press on, smile, and say hi, but inside you are madder than a hornet. I mean the audacity of the side-eye right? Who says, just because you don’t vibe you can’t say hi?

Sound familiar to anyone? This has happened to me lots. So many times in fact, it almost seems like a rite of passage as a member of the female gender. Simply put, if it hasn’t happened to you and you are a female, KEEP LIVING!

I mean really, since when is the common courtesy of a hello being fake? you can totally not like a person or not get a person and still speak. It’s called being civil and polite…better yet it’s called being a grown-up. Let’s not mistake “being real” for being immature.

Living a truly authentic life as I said in last week’s post, is not based on the behaviors or actions of others. It’s based on your standards and principles you set for yourself. So ladies, be the one who takes the initiative to speak first. Speaking first does NOT equate to best friends by any stretch. Please… for the love of God resist the urge to look our fellow sisters up and down to size them up only to point out whats wrong with them or what they are wearing. Don’t talk about them behind their backs, unless you are truly okay with someone doing that to you or your female loved one. I know, I know the argument always is people are gonna talk about others regardless to what another person does. But isn’t that just the point? We don’t base our actions off of the actions of another if we live in authenticity. Lastly, SMILE. It makes a big difference to look another female in the eyes and just smile even if she doesn’t smile back. Your smile could bring hope to her life that day and for all you know she doesn’t have a smile to give…She needs YOURS❤️.

Achea Redd

Achea Redd

about the author

Achea Redd is a mental health advocate, author of “Be Free Be You” and founder of Real Girls F.A.R.T. — a space to empower and equip women with the necessary tools to use their voices and become their best, most authentic selves.

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